Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Conversations With My Toddler: The Birds and The Bees

Is it sad that I had my first sex talk with my son before he was even 3 years old? Well, it's true, and it went a little something like this:

Me: Alright Tyler, let's put your undies on and cover up your wee-wee
Tyler: No, cover up YOUR wee-wee
Me: Mommy doesn't have a wee-wee Tyler!
Tyler: Yes you do
Me: No I don't
Tyler: Yes you do!
(meanwhile I'm thinking Really?! You're going to argue about this with me son?) 
Me: No I don't, only boys have wee-wees
Tyler: Does Jules have a wee-wee?
Me: No, Jules is a girl so she doesn't have a wee-wee
Tyler: I have a wee-wee, Daddy has a wee-wee, you don't have a wee-wee, and Jules doesn't have a wee-wee

...yup, my child is a genius.

And even better was a our talk about boobies...

Tyler: Does Daddy have boobies?
Me: No, only Mommies have boobies so they can feed their babies.
*Tyler lifts up Jordon's shirt and sees his nipples*
Tyler: Daddy does have boobies!
Me: Well, those aren't exactly boobies...
Tyler: Does Jules have boobies?
Me: Well kinda...
Tyler: Show me your boobies!

I sure hope I never hear those four words out of my son's mouth again!

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